英文经典幽默系列PDF电子书下载

Where is god? 1

Classmates? 2

Kids theories of science 3

Choose the Right One 3

Czech Dissident 4

Working in the garden 5

Frozen to death 5

Translate your CV 6

Signs＆Notices 7

Advertising Terms 1 8

Advertising Terms 2 9

The Bank Robber 10

Mother In Law 11

The Balloonist and the Programmer 12

Two-Cow philosophy 13

Out of the mouths of babes 14

Product Labels 16

A rich man goes to heaven 18

Air hostess 19

Climbing the stairs 20

Yet another“technical support” 20

Birthday belief systems 21

Doctors＆mechanics 23

The Microsoft waiter 23

You and your boss 25

Swapping professional secrets 26

Hit the floor—A true story 26

The job interview 28

Farmer joes accident 29

A bad hairdresser day 30

Woman held hostage by pillsbury biscuit 33

George W.Bush Bible—His favorite Bible verse 34

The“noisy cactus”That Turned out to Have Thousands of Tarantulas In It 35

Live on a Cruise Liner Rather than a Retirement Facility? 36

The hunters who end up dynamiting a brand new SUV and their dog on a frozen lake 38

The danger of Green Grass Snakes 39

The Louisiana lawyer who was asked to prove title on a piece of property“back to its origin” 42

The Arkansas woman who thought the rapture was taking place and got killed on a highway 43

Insulting voice mail at Pacific Palisades High School 45

Stories about crazy questions from government employees to travel agents 46

The man who owed zero and had to pay zero to correct his bill 49

A dogs eye view of the world 51

Adopt an NBA player 52

A French teachers memories:a short nap 55

A French teachers memories:boys are not born in cabbage fields 56

A French teachers memories:first day at school 57

A happy relationship with animals 59

A true story from the japanese embassy in US 61

Customer care in 2020 61

Eternal wit 63

Funniest letters to God from children 68

Funny sayings—simply bad life tips 70

Hello sir! 72

How to spot a fib 72

Humor quotations—top 35 funny quotations by famous comedians 73

I got to play an April fools joke before I was born 77

Interview repartees 79

Losing your voice 81

Memo:forbidden colors 85

Mick's curriculum vitae 87

My pet peeves 89

Not your average Sunday morning 91

Politically correct Christmas carols and holiday songs 94

Practical jokes list 99

Psychiatric psychiatrist—a joke on psychiatry 101

Re-incarnation is real 103

Sell your phones 104

Teacher arrested 106

The top 10 all time worst jokes about piano players 107

Three tortoises 109

To see or not to see 110

When the father becomes the groom 112

Assorted parenting funnies 114

Birthing drugs for dads 116

The bus driver's name 119

Football fever 119

I am NOT superwoman! 121

In the eyes of the beholder 123

Family life with jordy 126

Parents of teenagers:all we ask for is just a little information 127

Losin'it 130

I married a computer fanatic 132

Mixed nuts 134

Mommy Olympics 136

My mom,the spy 138

Pleasant Evening Out 139

Potty Mouth 142

President mom 145

Incorporating a referee's techniques into real life 146

Salad days 149

A Self-Diagnostic for Mothers with Deficient Noun Disease 151

Sensory warfare 154

Teaching sons to date 159

Truths 161

It was the night before Christmas when all through the mall 163

A mother's perspective on Valentine's Day 165

It's a wonderful life—before you read between the lines 167

You may be the parent of a teenager if 169

Speeding ticket 172

Big game hunting 173

Optimism 174

Excuse notes received by teachers 175

Things you did not know 176

Robber tried to deposit loot at the same bank 178

Anice idea 178

Honest advertising 179

Female reindeer 180

Announcements from the pulpit 181

The deaf man 181

A new job 182

Insurance claim 183

More technical support 184

Sleeping at work? 186

Famous mothers 187

Army insurance 189

Don't you remember 190

Never work again 191

Feel like a woman 192

Good communication 193

The crow and the rabbit 194

Strange laws 195

Give generously and sleep better? 196

Help with statistics 199

Florida court sets atheist Holy day 202

Actual Australian court docket 12659 case of the pregnant lady 203

The Saga of the Hotel Soap 204

“Freezing the balls off the brass monkey,”a navy phrase about cannon balls 208

Declaration of revocation 209

Website that offers a search of U.S.driver's licenses 215

Correspondence Between a Naval Officer and His Superiors in 1870 216

The two friends who died trying to get into a metallica concert and earned a darwin award 218

Burning mouse takes revenge by burning down house 219

Healings at barack obama rallies 220

The width of railroad tracks is based on a history that extends back to roman chariots 222

The word“shit”meant“ship high in transit” 224

Kerry supporter who stole bush campaign sign is arrested for multiple crimes 225

15 reasons why salesmen are the best lovers 227

911-actual call 228

Bad breath love 229

Bad days and bad timing 230

Bv chronicles 232

Car broken down 234

Chocolate prison 234

Circus owner in bar 237

Confessions of a reality TV junkie 238

Donkey eats buyer's money 240

Double peppermint schnapps on the rocks 241

Driving distractions:do you need cream and sugar? 243

Duct tape 245

Dumb luck 246

Eye spy potatoes 248

Fed up candy lashes out at unsuspecting parade goers 250

Finding　lost children 251

First month routine 253

Funny things we dream 254

Give them an inch 256

Heaven gets re-zoned 257

He had it coming,your honor 259

How to get attention,or:as you read this,you feel an irresistible urge to go on reading! 262

How to marry a wealthy guy 265

I do not like Cable T-V!!! 271

I Killed Santa Claus 273

Important safety tip 275

It's all about seeing the signs 277

Junior economics 279

Keeping Manfred clean 281

Laughing toward truth:six tips for lighthearted thinkers 283

Learning precision 286

Lizard induced schoolgirl screams 287

Making 2006,like,a big deal and stuff 289

Military wives 291

Mri humor:its still resonating,by golly! 293

New mobile applications shock market 295

Opposites attract laughter 304

Painful lessons from the maternity ward 305

Paying for the War 308

Pee here now 310

(not so) outgoing mail 313

Perks of global warming 315

Picking politicians as hurricane names 318

Politician offices of nano tube construction 319

Pool sweep shark robot 320

Potent pachyderms 321

Read this article if you want to hunt the spotted owl 323

Rock and roll dance—is it heaven or is it hell? 324

Rural relocation—considerations and adjustments 327

Saving SpongeBob using high tech 332

Should all lawyers be killed? 335

Slip-sliding on a peel 336

Someone at Walmart hates me 338

Spare change 342

Stained glass studio humor helps to overcome adversity—don't be like Milo 343

Stopping bad breath bart 347

Stun gun cat food robotic shocker 350

Survival instinct 351

Sweet vengeance 353

Tales of a spectator 356

The alternating traffic merge amendment to the constitution 362

The brilliant rejection dating maneuver 366

The day the toilet bit me 371

The drowning spool 375

The drunk goose massacree 377

The finer points of poverty 379

The hidden driveway 381

The jokes on you—who should be the butt of your jokes? 382

The long way around 384

The road to obesity 387

The way it used to be 389

They are finally revealed 390

This song won't be turned into a dance 391

To make and break! 393

Very precise fortune cookies 395

View from the stage:six pounds tall! 397

Wanted:treadmill for an elephant 399

What are you in for? 400

What if bird flu is listening to the news repots 402

When humans and dogs collide:negotiations for todays changing times 403

When pigs fly 405

Who are they trying to fool? 407

The diary of a 4 years old boy 409

A mother's perspective on a balanced universe 411

Batman 413

Because she's your mother—That's why! 418

Blarney and chocolate fudge 421

Boys and their toys 422

Trust during a business trip 425

Children,in order to have a Merry Christmas,please follow these rules 428

Children's future:bursting bubbles 433

How I spent my Christmas vacation 434

Dancing with Math 436

Delusions of Christmas grandeur 438

Dining out with women 441

How to discipline your parents 443

Be mine—You foolish,foolish man 449

Funny quotes from kids 451

Say goodbye to travelling light 452

Hide and speak 454

Husband sickness(or sick of my husband) 455

Infant as a second language 457

A good Interior decorator never tacks bobby Sherman to her wall 459

The joy of a box 463

Kid code of honor 465

Laundry is a heavy load 467

The laundry queen 469

Days of whine and(someone send me)roses 473

Little boys 476

Lost mommie 478

Missing my maternal memory 479

Math homework help:a calculated response 482

Maximum Security HELL 484

Merging traditions 487

Mommy bill of rights 489

The mommy rat race 492

Mom quits smoking—family in withdrawal 493

Conversation?Momversation 495

Mother's Day:my favorite no fuss holiday 497

Mum's the word—on school calendars 499

NASCAR 501

Hey you!Outta the kitchen! 503

Peanut butter:kid's secret for beautiful skin 505

Permit Day 507

Pickles and hiccups 509

Mom is not a mantra 512

Relationships top 10 515

Road trip 517

Sins of the mother 518

Sugar and spice 522

The terminator 524

The bad word 525

The things we do for love 527

This old(dog)house 529

Three kids in a parking lot 531

Virtual bonding 533

Wanted:insomniac group 535

Wardrobe worries 536

Prayer of a stay-at-home mother in mid August 538